Sick Man’s Log 22-216-0200

So the sickness has succeeded in decimating my circadian rhythm. I’m practically nocturnal at this point. Seeing as it’s barely 2am, and I’m restarting my full binge of Daredevil, I’m embracing my new life as a boogie man.

Part of me is sleepy still, but I’m missing so much of my day taking sixteen hour naps. I go to sleep and wake up when the sky is dark. My new life is that of a mushroom, without the unsettling dampness.

I don’t know what is to become of me in the long run, but within my hours of lucidity, I’ve been pondering life. I don’t want to continue this path I’m on. I tend to let life guide me and simply adjust to whatever new parameters are placed on my lap, but I kinda want to do a controlled burn. I kinda want predictability again. I kinda want to be able to steer myself in a favorable destination.

Of course, this is just 2am talk. I could, very well, fall asleep and wake up with a completely different mindset. Change is necessary, but my will is fleeting. I suck.

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